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Shame Over Desiring a Natural Birth

Dear Mothers,

You are not bad, defunct, broken, ignorant or unnecessary!

You are good, selfless, strong, intuitive, gentle and NEEDED!

I wish I could write a letter to all expecting mothers.  A letter they would read, and believe, and base their self-worth on.  If only all mothers knew how important they are.  If only they grasped their innate wisdom and trusted themselves more than the forums on the most frequented websites.  If only they really stood in their strength and walked tall in their ability.

Imagine what a beautiful, cheered up, gentle-ways world we would live in, if mothers were given their power back...

So often we hear nurses poo-pooing mothers for coming in with a birth plan, or OBs outright laughing at their pregnant patients when they say they are planning a natural birth. It becomes an "I'll show her" type of attitude and race to the finish. The incredulous attitudes of the caregivers who do not support mothers and have no faith in a woman's ability to give birth is common place in maternity care, but I would challenge you to realize that this attitude has NO PLACE in maternity care. NEVER should a mother be shunned for her desire to want what is best for herself and her baby. We act like she's selfish for wanting a good experience because she is somehow wanting this "silly" ideal over what is best for her baby.

Well, guess what... a mother's positive experience IS what is best for her baby. Do you think a damaged, traumatized mother who then experiences postpartum mood disorders because she's been so mistreated and even abused by her caregivers for the sake of fear, profit and power is a better mother than one who has a peaceful, un-interventive, natural and dare I even say enjoyable birth experience??

People with PTSD don't bond well. They experience damaging effects throughout the remainder of their lives. Is that better for mothers? Is that better for babies?

What is best for a mother IS best for her baby. They are synchronistic. And when something truly goes amiss, that mother will do anything for that baby and we all know this to be true. So, we can leave that part of the equation as a no-brainer. The issue is when American health care pretends that 35% and more of the mothers are those "crisis" and "endangered" and "emergency" situations when they didn't start out that way and most of the time never needed to end up that way.

So let's praise mothers who want what is best for themselves and their babies. Let's celebrate their choices and their ability. Let's remind those who feel insecure about their strength just how amazing they are. Let's expect the best OF them and FOR them.

Does birth matter to you? Does the experience matter to you? Does having a positive impact on birth matter to you? Then save this image and use it to show your solidarity with those of us who believe birth matters! Post it on your own social media and tag those powerful, wonderful, brave, loving and selfless women you know!

...and share with your mommy friends who need to be empowered and encouraged.  :)

NOTE: Pass it on! Use this icon above for your Facebook, twitter or LinkedIn profile image or post on Instagram or wherever you use social media, to show your support for all the birthing mamas out there who need to know birth DOES matter and they are not crazy for wanting the best experience possible for their little ones and themselves.

Start the summer out with a promise to yourself, to make a change.

We need to know we are not alone in our values. This is a basic human need - to know they are supported and heard. Show the world that you hear and that it's ok to have ideals that serve their own best outcome - even if it flies in the face of someone else's profit!

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