It's not easy being a doula. One aspect that might surprise you when you begin attending women, is the vulnerability you must allow within yourself when a mom NEEDS you in that way.
Ever really held the gaze of someone suffering who is literally pulling the strength and hope they need from you - out of your eyes?! You cannot look away in that moment. You just cannot, no matter how uncomfortable it makes you feel. She is depending on you. It may be a full length contraction from 1-2 minutes long. Yes. It happens. Have you held someone's gaze that long, while emitting love and approval, pride and concern from your soul, through your eyes? She will spot any glimmer of doubt.
Postnatal moms also at times will want you to hold them, nurture them, even cuddle them as they cry. It's part of mothering the mother. Can you be that open? Can you be that emotionally available? It's challenging.
In order to do this, one must be very solid within themselves. They can't waiver. They can't back off. They must possess the kind of humble confidence and surity that isn't common in the regular population.
Do you have what it takes? In all honesty, not everyone does. It takes very special women to do right by this blessed role.
You can't approach becoming a doula just thinking about what you will get out of it because it's not about that. It's far more about how much of yourself you will be giving to each and every client (and it will always require more than you expected).
Only in that, the more you give and the deeper your commitment, will you gain anything as a doula.
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